2016, A Caper of a Year

2016, as far as years go, was not my favorite! In fact it might go down in history as one of the worst, if not THE WORST. AND judging from friends' FB posts I am not alone in this sentiment. Even though this was a sucktastic year, I have had many great moments, learned a lot of important like lessons, and had life changing realizations.

What 2016 taught me:

1. Garlic goes on EVERYTHING and it should! Why did I wait until 2016 to cook with real garlic? I have been using garlic salt and garlic powder for years, but thanks to Blue Apron I have discovered the magic of mincing a fresh clove of garlic and throwing it in a pan with carrots, pasta, onions, eggs, kale, chicken, steak, fancy bread, and anything else you could possibly think of eating. We accidentally added it to a pear. It was weird, but it wasn't bad. I wonder if it would be good with cookies? I think I should search for a garlic cookie recipe and then my life will be perfect.

2. Kale really isn't that bad. I decided I didn't like kale before I even tried it. I knew it was gross just by looking at it. I didn't need to try it. I was using a four year old's logic. Then Blue Apron dropped it off at my door (actually, it was FedEx, but it was shipped by Blue Apron so it is kind of the same). I had no choice, but to cook it. By Gosh and By Golly, it was good. It was actually really really good. Of course it was cooked with garlic, so it didn't have a choice, but to be good. I even went to the grocery store and bought a bag of kale to add to a quiche I was making. Kale will be eaten in 2017.

3. Capers = Never. Blue Apron, this was a swing and a miss. These nasty pea looking balls of grossness should never ever be added to any recipe, ever. Garlic can't even help these tiny barf bombs. Do yourself a favor and don't ever eat a caper! They are the worst most unnecessary condiment known to humankind. 2017 WILL NOT HAVE ANY CAPERS!

4. Donuts. That is a sentence right? Donuts became my Friday night stress relief.  Then my Sunday morning kick start. Then my Wednesday midweek pick me up. I developed a major donut addiction. In 2016, I learned that in spite of their holes, donuts are NOT diet pastries. I mean, this is something I have always known, probably, but this year I have finally had to accepted it. I am carrying some extra donut baggage.

5. Karaoke ruins songs. Not because overzealous amateurs sound awful singing karaoke, (this doesn't bother me, I have been belting horrible sounding songs for years, that doesn't ruin songs for me) but because, as a visual learner, I actually take the time to let the lyrics scrolling across the screen sink in. These are the lyrics from the same songs I mindlessly sing in the car with the girls. Truly understanding the lyrics and what they mean is eye opening and a kick to the gut. There is just something about that moment when your 10 year old is singing "Cake By the Ocean" and she sings "Licking frosting from your own hands" and she gives you a look and you know that she knows this isn't something she should be singing (even if she doesn't know why she shouldn't be singing it). Then you give her a look and she knows that you know this is something that she shouldn't be singing. Then there is an awkward stutter and tripping over the words until the 10 year old does the grown up thing and suggests you change songs. Then you switch songs only to realize all the songs on this karaoke CD Santa brought are just as dirty so you just turn it off and decide to never ever listen to any kind of music with your children ever again...

6. Chores for children makes life easy. Sure the girls have always had to do things like clean their room and put away their clothes (not that they ever did it), but this year I decided to teach the girls chores that were more helpful to me. A1 now loads and unloads the dishwasher, cooks mac n cheese, meatloaf, and Ramon noodles. A2 loads the dishwasher, loads the washer (towels), and sweeps the kitchen floor. A3 is on shoe patrol and puts all stray shoes in the closet, vacuums, and wipes all the door handles. Teaching the girls to do these simple tasks has made my life easier and my towels cleaner.

7. Leggings ARE pants. At the beginning of 2016, I was on the side stating leggings are not pants; they are tights to be worn under a super long shirt A.K.A a dress. Then I was introduced to LLR and my life/wardrobe was changed forever. Even though I choose to wear my leggings under a long shirt or dress, I still feel they are pants. Merriam Webster also agrees. They define pants as : "an outer garment covering each leg separately and usually extending from the waist to the ankle." Therefore, leggings are pants. AND they are pants that make me happy because they don't hurt! 

Who wouldn't be happy wearing these?
I mean, other than Mrs. Potato Head.

8. Facing my fears is kind of exhilarating. This summer I had to face the paralyzing fear of using anesthesia during my colonoscopy. I know it was just a control issue. I have a need to be in control at all times and I knew that wasn't going to be the case while I was having a procedure done. I had no choice, but to just accept that I was going to have to do it. I spent countess nights awake worrying. Then I had the procedure with the anesthesia and it was ok. Nothing bad happened. While I didn't actually do anything, other than show up, I did it. It felt like I really accomplished something. It is a feeling I won't forget. I am ready to take on more fears. As luck would have it, I have plenty of fears to face. I will be good for years to come.

9. Yoga > NyQuil. I discovered yoga. Sure, I have done occasional yoga videos as a part of other workout programs. I have also done a lot of kid yoga. BUT when a friend of mine said she was starting a 21 day yoga challenge group I was intrigued. I had previously stopped all forms of working out. My iron lacking body was in no mood to do anything but sleep and eat high sugary things (Donuts) I thought I could probably try yoga. It wasn't high impact and it wouldn't require a lot of fast intense movements. I did it. It turns out it was the best thing I have ever done for me. During those 3 weeks, I felt amazing. I slept real sleep every night. Yoga > NyQuil. I quickly found out I had to do my workout close to bedtime because it would knock me out. Within 5 minutes of finishing I could hardly keep my eyes open. Some nights I wouldn't even make it up the stairs before I was shutting down. Yoga is my all natural sleeping pill. I am getting back to it tonight.
  
10. I have the best friends anyone could ask for! This year was trying on me socially. I didn't feel like doing anything, except feel sorry for myself and sleep. My friends didn't give up on me. They continued to invite me to things even if they knew it was WAAAAYYY past my 9:00 bed time. I had friends step up to help give A2 the time and attention she needed to get through the school year. I had friends who helped with transportation for the girls when I was tied up at the Dr's office. I had friends show up with dinner. I had friends show up with donuts. I had friends just show up. I had friends who would sit with us on Friday nights when Mac was gone. We would sit on the couch eating donuts while the kids played. I really have the greatest friends who love me, even when I have been in a low iron funk for an entire year.  

If 2016 was a condiment, it would be a caper. Even if it was a barf bomb of a year, I still learned a lot and I am a better person because of it. I really hope 2017 is ketchup. Everyone loves ketchup. It really goes with everything. We all deserve a ketchup year!