Being Rejected, Kind of

My rational self knows that everyday the girls are getting older, but I try not to think about it too much.  I don't want to be reminded that they won't always be the tiny people they are right now.  Sometimes I can go an entire week without the passage of time being thrown in my face.

Tonight; however, I was smacked upside the head with the "the girls are getting older" message.  A3 was the courier.  After I finished watching a movie downstairs, I could hear her moving in her bed upstairs.  She likes to bang her head on the rail of the crib when she wakes up at night.  She doesn't ever cry, so we assume it isn't hurting her. I guess we will find out in a few years if it caused any brain damage... Some nights I will go in while she is doing it and move her.  Most of the time she is still half asleep while she is doing it so she doesn't even realize I am there.  I will just roll her over put her blanket back on her and she falls back to sleep.

I ran up the stairs, checked on A1 and A2 who weren't sleeping in their room where they were supposed to be, and then I went to A3's room.  She continued to rock in her bed, banging her hear on the rail as I walked up to her.  I picker her up, gave her a hug and kiss, then I put her back in her bed.  I decided I would kneel down so I could watch her sleep at her level. I had just gotten comfortable when a pudgy hand stuck through the rail, as she pointed she said, "Mom, door."

THAT LITTLE STINKER WAS TELLNG ME TO LEAVE! I felt so rejected as I came to the conclusion she was at an age where she would rather put herself back to sleep than have me hang around and help.  I was starting to get depressed when I recalled that she never wanted anyone to help her get to sleep. She was the one who never fell asleep when I rocked her.  She never wanted to sleep anywhere but in her own room. Alone.

Phew! Was starting to feel better and then I remembered A1 and A2 would have to be moved out of my bed before I could go to sleep. Now, if only I could get these two to grow up to the point where they can put themselves back to sleep and need me to comfort them at night, every night.