Frustration Turns to Anger

Confession time: Tonight I was extra frustrated with the girls.  The fighting and arguing started as soon as A1 got in the car; A2 looked at her a little too long. The bickering continued the rest of the night. A1 was breathing too close to A2. A2 walked to close to A1. A2 couldn't understand what A3 wanted.  A2 wasn't fast enough at getting A3 her shoe. A1 was starving  A1 didn't like dinner.  A3 didn't want to eat. A3 wanted her "paci." A3 cried screamed throughout dinner. A2 was sad. A2 missed me during the day. A2 needed more alone time with me.  A2 had a mini-meltdown.

By the time I was putting them in bed, I was less than friendly. I practically growled, "Good night, I love you." I was fed up! My headache was back. All I wanted to do was curl up on the couch and get lost in some fictitious world on TV. Before I made it to the couch, I stopped at the recliner and grabbed my phone.  I was so angry. Angry with the girls, angry with Mac for being at a meeting, angry with myself for losing my cool. 

I know that being angry won't help anything, in fact it will only make things worse.  I tried to let it go, Oh THAT song, hearing it so much is also making me angry. I said a quick prayer.  I asked God to help me get over the anger so I can be a better person and mom.  I waited.  I didn't feel better.  I was still angry.  THOSE GIRLS WERE ROTTEN. I was fuming again.

I decided I would peruse Facebook, hoping someone would entertain me enough to forget my problems.  I was a few status updates in when the tears started flowing, my Thursday night cry was in full force. God was talking to me.  My prayer was answered on Facebook. His messages came through a status update from a former high school classmate whose three daughters were taken from her much too early.  The pictures of her girls instantly washed my anger away.  I wanted to hug and hold my girls, just as she probably does.  I am sure she longs for another day to be frustrated with her girls. I imagine she would give anything to hear them argue, whine, complain, and fight.

God spoke to me through her update. He is there listening to me. He is there with me while the girls are creating their beautiful chaos. 

With this realization, I instantly became calm.  My head hurt a little less.  It is ok to become frustrated with the girls because being a mom is stressful! It isn't ok to be angry and really it just a waste of time and I certainly don't have any of that to waste! God is good and he has the answers. I am going to go to bed tonight with a renewed sense of peace. Tomorrow will be a "Girls' Night In," movies and cuddling are on the agenda.

    Psalms 37:8 Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath!  Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil.