I'm well aware that I have put on some, er... quite a bit of weight this year. I don't need constant reminders. Here are a few things you no longer need to do, since I get it.
1. Ask about my thyroid. No, I don't have a thyroid condition. I simply gained weight. We'll not simply, I'm sure the 100 or so bags of Brach's Malted Eggs may have played a roll.
2. Hold up my school ID and compare my current state to the beginning of the year picture while saying something along the lines of, "Wow, you have really changed. I almost didn't recognize you."
3. Pat my belly and jokingly ask when the baby is due. That is just cruel on so many levels, so A1, I hope you are reading this.
4. Monitor my food intake. I am an adult and I don't need you there to keep me accountable, unless I have asked you to help keep me accountable by reminding me to drink more water and less soda... Science Teacher you know who you are!
5. Give me smaller portions. Don't look me up and down then cut my piece of cake noticeably smaller than the rest. This only made me ask for seconds to irritate you.
6. Tell me about diets. If I ask you about a diet, tell me about your diet. If I don't ask you about your diet, don't tell me about your diet. I know what I need to do, give up the soda and malted eggs, I'm just not there yet.
7. Shame me into exercising. You aren't with me every minute of the day. You don't know what I do. You don't know how tired I get after working all day while being a mom full time. You don't know. Stop telling me to find an hour of "me time" to workout. Stop telling me it will make my life less stressful. Right now, today, it won't.
8. Ask me if I'm happy. You don't need to ask me if food makes me happy. It does. Food makes me happy! Food makes me joyful, but so do the A Team, Mac, family, friends, laughter, singing, dancing, watching TV, reading books and a number of other things. I don't eat food to be happy, but I'm happy eating food.
9. Poke my stomach and make strange mouth noises. Lady at Walmart I'm talking to you, no just kidding, but A2 this really isn't cool.
10. Ask me when I'm going to start running again. This is a tricky one since some people genuinely want to know if I'm running again, not because of my weight, but because they knew it was a habit I had a love hate relationship with in my past. Maybe just avoid saying things like, "you should start running again, it would be good for you." No really, I'm not sure that is good for me since my knees swell up and I can't walk the rest of the day. I'm better with walking at a fast pace.
Thank you all for your concern. I'm aware I'm bigger now than I was at the beginning of the school year. I am, after all, the one still trying to squeeze into clothes that are a tad too snug. I know I have gained weight.
Love,
Me (all of me)
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